What do we mean when we say that we Love someone? Do we actually love that person as a separate entity, a separate object? And if we do and it is truly Love, then it stands to reason that it would always be love that we feel around that person, not sometimes love but then resentment and hatred when they act in a way that doesn’t fit with our expectations. What is real can be said to be those things that do not change, which do not arise and pass away like clouds forming and disappearing. The underlying substance of clouds is the water that may change form, from water to vapor to ice to clouds, etc., but nonetheless the basic substance is always present. So the changing forms are only that, passing appearances while the underlying reality is always present though not always realized.
In looking a little more deeply, it is seen that certain people’s personalities tend to allow us to access feelings of love that are already within us. So following our reasoning, the feelings of love must always be present like the sun shining behind the clouds, but may not always be noticed if they are clouded over with anger, grief, resentment and fear. When someone’s personality causes us to feel happy and joyful, we attach what we are feeling to the separate entity, the separate object of our attention, in this case another person but it could just as easily be an outside situation. But again, if their actions change which of course they do, all of a sudden they appear to be the cause of other, not so pleasant feelings.
Joy is the experience of happiness and acceptance with all of life exactly as it is appearing in the present moment, no complaints or problems with things as they are. Real love is also this, so love attached to another person is in a sense an illusion, it is their personality appearing pleasing to us at the time, allowing us to access the deeper love and joy that is always within us, although clouded over with other feelings due to our basic misunderstanding of life, which is that it is possible that life should be other than it actually is in this moment. It is wonderful to be with people or a special someone that does this for us so long as we don’t attach our happiness to them, then it becomes a source of unhappiness and suffering as we expect them to make us happy, which is not actually possible.